When preparing for weight loss surgery I researched and reviewed everything possible. I knew all of the potential risks and rewards that could come from having most of my stomach cut out of my body. I heard about the potential for having loose skin after losing significant weight (and believe me there is plenty of that going on right now). And these were all things that I was prepared for. I have been exercising and using varying lotions to combat the skin issue so as to try to not look like a deflated balloon even though under any pretty clothes I am all saggy baggy skin but that's ok, the saggy empty skin is healthier then swelled up skin full of excess weight.
What I was not fully and totally prepared for was the mental battle that goes with the weight loss. I had read about people with body image issues after surgery but I had the thought that it wasn't going to happen to me. I am a realist and thought I always looked at things the way they really are. I may have touched on this in a previous post but the mental side of getting my brain to catch up to the image in the mirror is a lot harder then I ever thought it would be. Physically I feel a world of difference in energy and ability to do physical tasks. But mentally when I look in the mirror all I still see is the rolls and heavy legs and I still see the same person I was when I was over 300 pounds. My brain does not know how to see me as I am right now. When I go shopping I am still buying things that are on average 2 sizes too big for me. The only time I see the difference is when I look at side by side pictures of where I was to where I am now. I guess this is just me taking a minute to be real about this journey with the good and some not great aspects of it all.
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